Desperation
by Ivydoll
Summary: AndoHiro. Discoveries in Vegas. Future chapters: The parttime job that broke Hiro's heart. The pastry that Davit destroyed. Brielle's missing contact lens. Ando's sexual confusion. Elements that suggest plot.
1. Chapter 1

**(KAI) **Heroes is fun.

--

**Desperation**

He wakes from a dead sleep, sweat dripping from a rounded face. His glasses have slipped past his nose, half dangling from one ear. "_Ne!_" he whines, scrambling away from the door. "Ando-kun! You let me fall asleep."

His friend- best friend, surely, since everything they've experienced together- eyed him tiredly, nonplussed. "Ah, Hiro."

"Ando!" Hiro whines again, and then shivers, because the name brings the dream, and the dream is a memory. "Oh..."

Ando's gaze remains fixed on the road, his hands numb on the steering wheel. "_Nani_?"

"Ano..."

Ando's dark eyes flicker in exhaustion, and he gives in. "I'll stop at the next motel."

"_H-Hai_..."

Ando knows something is wrong. He can read Hiro like a book; a skill he has never possessed with any other human being. It is likely a matter of the younger man wearing his heart on his sleeve like the Trekkie geek he is... but Ando feels unnervingly pleased to know Hiro's every feeling, regardless.

"Ando-kun, why didn't you go back to Japan?"

This is an awkward question; the Hokkaido-native has not been able to determine this for himself, as yet. But he shrugs, "You always need help, Hiro, who is going to do it besides me?"

Hiro's shoulders sag, "_Saa_... you're right."

But he is unusually quiet on the way back into Vegas.


	2. Chapter 2

**(KAI)** Thanks BEW. :D  
Q: Is Ando really from Hokkaido, originally?  
A: I made it up.

--

**Des2**

Ando's eyes are bloodshot; every time he yawns, his jaw creaks. Patiently, Hiro sits on the farther twin bed with his ankles crossed, so that he looks rather like an especially concerned Good-Luck Cat.

"Ando-kun... Ando-kun..."

The taller rests briefly, sending Hiro an expression of the utmost feigned patience. "Are you going to let me unpack?"

"It's only that, Ando-kun, you seem angry."

"Tired and Angry are two different things"

"I know that," Hiro's face scrunches up- the frowning pout that makes him look about as mature as an eight-year-old.

Ignoring his friend, Ando finished unpacking the necessities of travel- one item in particular, a miniature scroll he'd kept on his desk, amongst pens, with the word _willpower_ inscribed with kanji.

"Hiro, you're tired too. Let's rest."

The younger's first instinct was to forcefully tell Ando _No_, but there was a desperate and quiet look in Ando's eyes that warned him off. At times, Ando, though he had always been impersonal to the point of being secretive, was surprisingly easy to read at times.

"Are you sure you're all right...?"

Ando's smile was as tired as his eyes. "Yes; I'm just sleepy, Hiro."

Although dark thoughts harbored in the back of Ando's mind were whispering hushed and startling things, the smile that Hiro flashed him then was so bright, it made things seem all right for just that moment. Hiro's cute smile- the "_Yatta!_" smile.

And for just that moment, he forgot the driving pain in his hands.


	3. Chapter 3

**(KAI)** We lost our 'drabble' feel.  
Mutating into a fic, with plot devices, and foreshadowing...  
Here and I wanted to be done.

--

**Des3**

Hiro happened to know his ability was not precognitive, nor was it premonitory. However, the dreams were stylistically gruesome enough to cause the second starting wake he'd so far experienced upon Ando's return to his company.

He sat up and took a deep breath, glancing over at his sleeping room-mate; curled toward him, with hands shoved between the occasionally shivering knees. Ando's serious face seemed more lax in rest.

"_He's cold,_" the chubby young man sighed in Japanese before yawning and trudging across the cool floor.

It didn't take long to drag the blanket back over his friend's shoulders.

Ando shifted, and Hiro numbly, in the back of his mind where he was not practically sleep-walking, wondered what he would say when discovered hovering over Ando's side of the room.

But Ando smiled briefly, and Hiro wished he'd stopped time.

Just for that moment.

--

When the older Japanese man awoke, his body creaked from a stiff night's sleep, and he was dismayed to find it was early in the morning, golden tea-colored light cascading in a merry fashion all across the room, through faded gingham curtains. Hiro was curled around his pillow, unaware.

Dragging a cold hand through his short, black hair, Ando was pleased to find that the freezing chill in his fingers had been somehow reduced, which was just as well, as he didn't particularly trust Hiro driving.

He had become rather attached to that little car.

Twenty minutes into the shower he'd been enjoying, a plaintive voice rose from the room over, separated by paper-thin walling.

"_Ano_, let's get something to eat!"

Normally, he wouldn't have smiled. Under the treads of hot water, he did.


	4. Chapter 4

**(KAI)** Remember "ShorT ChapterS OuT OF ControL"?  
Sure you do.

--

**Des4**

There was reason Hiro was not as svelte as Ando. It was breakfasts like this; a zealous gourmand if there ever was one, Hiro's piled waffles and syrup quietly insulted Ando's toast and coffee, which he ate slowly, so as to make the heat of the java last.

"_That was strange and rude!_" the gourmand mumbled, around his sticky-sweet breakfast, in Japanese.

The taller grunted; the man, clearly overheating in the small restaurant, had been in such a rush, he'd knocked solidly into Ando's shoulder without a passing apology.

"_Americans are like that_."

"_Yo-guru-to._" Hiro said chidingly.

Ando looked up, frowning from his newspaper. But Hiro's eyes were glittering with mischief. So, the taller rolled the news up, and pretended to beat him.

It had been a while since they'd laughed so hard.


	5. Chapter 5

**(KAI) **Well, here we go, trudging through.  
I've managed to miss so much of this series.  
It's ridiculous.

--

**Des5**

Brielle shot up; her entire body was on fire, burning in ice and skewered on the tip of a sword. Deep panting breaths whipped through her, until only the cooling sweat on her brow slipping past her temple was sensation enough to rouse her from the rumpled bed. Of two weeks worth of strange dreams, this was the tenth that involved the rotating images of an icy, burning hell, coupled with dragons and fire-breathing gods.

She didn't even like Vegas.

--

They walked through the city almost comfortably. Hiro was sure something was afoot in Vegas- something untold as yet. Ando was sure Hiro was going crazy, but he kept this to himself, shivering despite the temperately cool morning.

"I am having fire-dreams," Hiro mumbled, not mentioning whom was on fire.

"I am having dreams where I am back in Japan, working my comfortable job, and occasionally eating good miso."

Hiro frowned, "You… you can go _back_."

"No," Ando's mouth quirked and he sighed. "Dreams are just dreams. They don't mean anything."

"What if some did?" Hiro blurted, grabbing the fabric of Ando's windbreaker and bringing them to a stop outside of a small bakery, nestled in the homey outskirts of the Vegas scene.

The elder's eyebrows creased, "Hiro-"

"Excuse me!"

She was blonde, green-eyed and adorable. And she was hurtling toward them at fifteen miles an hour, gripping the bicycle's brakes uselessly.


	6. Chapter 6

**(KAI)** Hey!  
Longest chapter.

--

**Des6**

"Do you know them?" a blue-eyed man asked the baker in charge, sweeping the floor in a relaxed fashion.

His father squinted, "Nope. Don't know any Japs."

"Hunh. They seem familiar."

"Everyone seems familiar to you," the baker, whose name was Brian, laughed congenially.

Davit smiled in turn, and swept with slightly increased fervor. "Well, at any rate, they sure seem familiar with each other."

"Hm," Brian glanced over before smiling lecherously, "speaking of _familiar _people, Brielle should be back any time."

He was rewarded with a deep blush, partially hidden behind dark hair, as Davit ducked his head and laughed nervously. "Yeah, soon."

"I bet-" Brian began before a series of crashes and shouts overpowered his fading voice.

--

"Watch out!" Ando shoved Hiro to the side, into the rickety newspaper stand. At that moment, Hiro cried out, his back twisting as he avoided the bicycle rack nearby. Trying to follow Hiro's movement, Ando took the full brunt of the girl's turned front wheel, and a moment after that, the full brunt of her little body hitting him square in the chest.

"Ouch," she said, eyes fuzzy with stars. Ando repeated the statement before sitting up, as quickly as he was able with a girl spread across his torso.

"Yes," Ando said, rubbing his head, "Are you all right?"

The moment the stars cleared, she looked at him, fully, closely. As his words sunk in, she sucked in a breath. He was handsome; a foreigner with strong, Asian features. _What dark eyes_, she thought, fairly well enrapt, and feeling so cool and refreshed even after her harried ride, until a high wail cut through her mesmerized state.

"Ando-kun!" Hiro limped over, hunched, "_Ando-kun, daijobu?_"

There was an edge of panic to the younger's voice that made him feel rather special, "I'm fine, just fine."

Except for the bruises and possible concussion.

"Miss?"

The girl, blushing wildly, scrambled up and smoothed her skirt with some embarrassment, while Hiro watched her curiously. "I'm really sorry," she said to Ando, still red, and now with scrapes to show for it.

"Brielle!" Hiro looked first, confused. _Biiru_? he thought absently, moving closer to Ando, in part to grab onto him should he fall, which, if his back's complaining indicated, would occur only momentarily. Ando glanced at him before turning back watch a dark-haired man wielding a broom.

"Hiro, are _you_ okay?" he had noticed the younger's pained expression as he'd risen from his abrupt fall.

"I..." Hiro debated telling him.

"What happened to your bike?" the American man's voice distracted him, and he looked over to see the girl- Brielle- laughing nervously, and shifting her weight from one foot to the next.

"Well, you 'member I told you I thought the brakes were bein' funny?"

The man's eyebrow rose, though not in a menacing fashion.

"Well, they were bein' _really_ funny today," she smiled, a bright, chagrined smile, "And by funny I mean broken."

Brain _humphed_, standing in the doorway, and Hiro squeaked- the man was a megalith, all thick sides and bright, sharp green eyes. "Daddy!" Brielle grinned, running up to him with only a slight limp.

At Hiro's movement behind him, Ando leaned to put one hand behind the younger, where his hands came to rest on Hiro's back, "We're very sorry, we'll be on our way."

The big man shrugged, "Nonsense, Yoshi, you and your friend come inside and get patched up. Brielle, go and set the table in upstairs. Davit... You help her."

Ando watched with interest as the Davit, the young man with the broom, ducked his head and hurriedly followed the girl inside.

"My name's Brian," the baker said offhandedly, walking over to right the newspapers, "And you boys own me a story for makin' a mess in front of my shop."


	7. Chapter 7

**(KAI)** Did I say "long chapter" last chapter?  
Well, I meant, "longer by comparison."  
That bitch was only 5kb.  
(Did the last chapter seem to convenient? Too bad.)

--

**Des7**

"Brielle is short for Gabrielle, you see?" the tiny girl was saying, serving coffee into the hydrangea-covered tea set. "I was named after my mom- her nickname was Gabby, so we had to think of something else."

Davit's hands seemed to shake when they passed too closely to hers.

"I see," Ando said politely, smiling. Hiro sat beside him, sipping the coffee which had since been doctored to a pale, creamy color. "_Does your back still hurt?_" he asked in Japanese, nodding and smiling when Brian offered him a pastry.

"_A bit,_" Hiro responded, which meant, _I really would prefer to be dead, now._

Embarrassingly, he almost wished he could ask Ando to touch his back again, the way he had when they'd been ushered inside. For a few moments, the pain had gone away in a fantastic rush of cool. But the numbing effect of Ando's spectacularly cold hands had since worn off, and his back was now throbbing- low and persistent.

"_You're hunched over_," Ando whispered before Brian's voice cut through.

"So tell us why you're on this side of the Pacific, Yoshi."

Ando smiled, a sort of grimace halfway between amusement and offense, "We're..." he looked at Hiro, who looked in no mood to jump in and explain the ridiculous details of their mission, "on vacation."

Hiro nodded mutely, as though exhausted, but then added, "Learning English."

Brielle clapped her hands excitedly, "How cool!"

Ando smiled in turn, as she settled next to him, smoothing her skirt demurely. She was adorable- no older than seventeen, petite, and looking innocent with a haircut that brushed her chin when she moved her head.

Bright, green eyes.

Ando swallowed hard and looked away. To help distract himself, he focused on the light pain running through his hands- as though they had been asleep, they tingled and occasionally spasmed. Still, he had the relentless urge to return his gaze to her. Instead, he watched as Hiro laid his head down on folded arms, and abruptly went to sleep.

Davit frowned, "Is he okay?"

"No, I don't think so," Ando said, troubled, "I think he- I think I hurt him when I pushed him out of the way."

"Oh..." Brielle grimaced prettily and hopped up, disappearing behind a seperatory curtain between the tiny dining room and the equally small kitchen. When she returned, brushing Davit's arm as she went, she settled a bottle of not-quite prescription pain pills next to Ando's elbow. "Here, I'll get a baggie, too."

"Those?" Brian huffed, "Let him have the whole bottle if his friend's in no good shape."

Ando blanched, "Aa, you're too generous; I can't repay you."

Brian's laughter nearly echoed through his chest, for being so loud and rich, "Nonsense, Yoshi."

Ando smiled, briefly wondering how some people could be so kind and giving, like Brielle and her father, and others miserable and rude, like the man who'd shoved past him at the diner. Looking at Hiro, he wondered what a world with only sweet, harmless people like the other Japanese man would be like, and, amused, he smiled.

"I am glad for your hospitality," Ando reached over to scoot Hiro's cup from the table's edge, "I don't think we would have had money enough for medication."

Davit was the first to unravel the innocuous statement- a lifetime of his mother's coded sentences and deep sighs could have made a dead puppy psychic. "Has your trip cost you more than you expected? Do you need help?"

For the second time, Ando blanched, his hand trailing comfortably from Hiro's shoulder as he turned to the young American, who straddled his chair cowboy-style. "No, no, it's not like that-"

Brian leaned forward, "Do you need a part-time job, son?"

Whipping his head from side to side, Ando had little choice but to submit to their scheming.


	8. Chapter 8

**(KAI)** This one took a while longer.  
I blame it on figuring out the plot.  
Also: **Q** What's the timeline on this thing?  
**A** Early series; an alternate timeline of them arriving in Vegas.  
I suppose instead of going to a casino and all else... this happened. XD

--

**Des8**

Hiro woke up some time later, a screaming pain in his back. Almost whimpering, he lifted himself from the table's top, reaching for Ando immediately. This time, the dream had been more intense than could be imagined, and the fire seemed almost real, seemed almost to burn him. "Ando-kun?" he warbled, voice cut in two by a searing pain that shot through his spine as he moved. "_Itai!_"

Brielle looked first, her face unusually warm as she kneaded bread on their counter, chatting with Davit and the foreigner, Ando, whom she would very well have liked to chat with alone. "Did you guys hear that?"

"Was that your friend, Yoshi?" Brian turned from the dishes piled behind Brielle and frowned. Ando immediately stood, clenching his aching hands, bowing and mumbling a quick _Sumimasen_ before quickly stepping into the next room.

On the floor, curled in on himself and fighting tears, was the younger man, his hands between his knees in humiliation.

"What- are you all right?" Ando fell to the ground gracelessly, followed by Brielle and Davit. Brian seemed to have found the dishes more of an attention-getter, or otherwise realized his presence unnecessary. Good fathers often were like that.

Brielle leaned on Davit's shoulder, and Davit smoldered under her light touch, but managed to ask, "What happened?"

"_Hiro_," Ando said, this time in Japanese, "_Are you all right? Is it your back_?"

He received a mewl of embarrassment and then Hiro feebly looked away, mumbling, "_Sorry._"

"_It's fine! Don't worry about it... I'm sorry I shoved you_," Ando frowned, glancing at Davit, "Could you help me get him outside? The car is parked down the street; I can drive it up and take him home."

Home. Home was just a motel on a seedy strip with too-thin walls and peeling wallpaper. But... it was tucked away, and getting Hiro to bed-rest seemed the best course of action. A nervous worry was eating at him; as cold as the ice in his hands.

Davit nodded, and took the moment to squeeze Brielle's hand, though she seemed not to notice. "I'll go grab the pills the old man's giving you."

"Right," Ando mumbled, resting one hand on Hiro's back, beneath the shirt. "_Does this hurt_?"

"Iie..."

"_This?_" Ando pressed a particular column and Hiro gasped sharply.

"Y-yes," Hiro stammered, trying to sit up.

"Don't," Ando sighed, "You've slipped a disc; we'll have to take you somewhere. I don't know..."

Hiro's eyes narrowed in confusion; he'd only managed to understand half of the sentence with the dull pain in his spine. Nearby, Davit fret with the appearance of a man who wanted to say something, but wasn't sure how to interject.

Brian appeared then, wiping his wet hands on a towel and grimacing. "You two don't have the best luck, do you?"

Ando forced a small laugh, thinking of how life had changed since Hiro's powers had manifested. He refrained from alluding to such things, however, and moved to lift Hiro from the floor. "Let me help," Brian sighed, taking one of Hiro's arms and lifting it over his head.

"One, two..." Ando said, and they raised the injured young man to a standing position. Hiro hung his head, leaning toward Ando, and tried to hide the dampness gathering in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Ando-kun," he said softly, humiliated.

"Don't be," Ando whispered, letting his forehead rest against Hiro's for a short moment, before Davit came in, with the bottle of pills and a small box.

"Here, have some of my extra pain patches, they heat up..." Davit thrust them toward Ando before realizing Ando's hands were full. "Er, sorry, I'll just put them in the car when you get it. I always buy too many, anyhow."

The foreigner nodded, sighing heavily at the feel of tears on his neck, and proceeded.


	9. Chapter 9

**(KAI)** As I write this, I am sad to see the CA series finished...  
Thanks everyone who reviewed those AndoHiro shorts! +waves flag+  
In response to questioning, Desperation will run for 15 chapters.  
That's 7 more. (8 if you count chapter 9.)  
(Why can't I be bothered with writing numbers _out_ today...?)

--

**Des9**

Ando ignored him. He re-crossed his knee and shuffled the newspaper accordingly, but as traumatic and interesting as the recent fire downtown had been, ravaging a small electronics outlet as it had, Hiro's sulking across the room demanded his attention like nothing else.

"Hiro, please," he said at length, turning to see the younger, wrapped around a pillow and staring at him from under a shroud of blankets, still glaring.

"What?"

"Stop."

"Stop what?"

"You know what-" Ando snapped before taking a breath and laying the paper to the side. Brian's pain medication had turned Hiro quite petulant, quite fast. "Go to sleep, all right? Tomorrow, Davit is coming to set your back properly."

"I don't care," Hiro retorted, before withering under Ando's stormy gaze. He receded into the blankets a bit, wondering just what it was about his situation that was making him so crabby.

Pills, Ando had said, Pills, pills, pills.

But Hiro was darkly suspicious it was, to him, something more. For Hiro, in fact, the green-eyed monster of jealousy also had an infuriatingly cute bob haircut. These, a circle of repressed thoughts which left Hiro even more irritable and confused than he already was.

"I'll be fine," he amended, resettling on the pillow, though his eyes felt heavy. "I just feel like we should keep going..."

"No, we need to take a break," Ando's eyes are stern; stern insofar, he smiled afterward and walked over. "Until you get better, anyway. And making some money is a good idea. Why should we drain our savings?"

Hiro drew his lips in a small frown, annoyed with the older man's logic. Ando knew just the way to make him feel like a spoiled child. "Fine... you're right."

When Ando smiles again, Hiro nearly forgives him.

"How is your back?" Ando settled his hand on the vague area which Hiro's back seemed to be, curled beneath the comforter.

After a moment, Hiro closed his eyes and hid his face in the pillow, mumbling, "Better."

By which he meant, 'Since you touched me,' rather than, 'Since the pills.'

Ando smiled, "Then the pills are working."

Hiro grimaced into the pillow, "Yes..."

But Ando did not leave immediately again. For a moment, he sat on the bed's edge and slowly meandered one of his aching hands across Hiro's form. Activity usually appeased them, and he had been tempted to take pain medication for them, but found it wasn't worth depleting Hiro's supply. At least the coldness that radiated from his fingertips seemed to soothe his best friend.

Best friend. Ando's smile widened.

--

Very soon, Hiro found himself asleep; by what combination of pain medication or the numbing touch of Ando's hands he was unsure, but he nonetheless found himself very, very deeply asleep.

In the dream, a soft pressure stayed at his back, while he, on a bicycle, careened into Ando; the older man pushed a girl who looked at one like Brielle and another like Janeway, and he found himself then tangled across Ando's chest.

The warmth increased. Like sparks, and like consumption- suddenly, the whole of the dreamscape was consumed in flames, deep, blue and flickering fire. Leaning close, he could feel Ando's breath.

Softly.

Until he was pushed to the side, where he watched Ando rush to the girl who was Brielle and Janeway.

Whom he suddenly, violently, _hated_.

--

It was not the first time she had woken up shaking. Not the first time she had immediately gotten up, grabbing a pillow and the stuffed unicorn, and joined Davit in his bed downstairs. But it was the first time she had felt so utterly lost.

Frightened, angry, desperate, morose... but never so _lost_.

It was never an emotion that belonged to her. These dreams- haunting and occasionally horrific- they seemed to belong always to someone else. This dream, she felt, belonged to someone she might even know.

These dark dreams... that sometimes foretold events before they happened.

Shivering, she threw her pillow down, next to Davit's. He yawned, hardly conscious, and made room for her in the sheets. These nights, she knew, it was worth its weight in gold to have a best friend like him, whose arms around her could protect from the dark.


End file.
